Shadow Working Tool: Compassion Talk

Hey Soul Family,

One of the biggest issues that we have been collectively facing is shifting our negative inner narrative, so I have decided to share a great tool to help with shifting that perspective. So many people beat themselves up and are highly critical of themselves. This leads us to feel even worse about ourselves. This is not our fault though, but it is our job to be self-aware about the patterns that we keep that aren’t healthy for our mental health. The reason why we are so critical about ourselves is because we were raised either within a household where someone spoke this way, or we were exposed to this talk when someone spoke to us this way.

Either way, over time this voice became deeply ingrained within our psyche and now when we criticize ourselves, we can still hear those echoes of the past. I want you to let this go though. A huge part of the healing process is the reparenting process, and with that will come compassionate talk. I want you to use this tool to begin shifting the inner narrative and perspectives that you currently carry. You are loved and you are worthy! It is OK to make mistakes. What is a mistake but a learning opportunity. Next time you make a mistake, don’t be so hard on yourself. ALL of us are here having a human experience and sometimes this experience can be a difficult one, but you are not alone. Many of us are super hard on ourselves, but that isn’t love. It’s rooted in control.


As you move forward through your shadow work, you should begin changing the narrative you’ve always told yourself. Going forward, I want you to be very mindful of how you speak to yourself and the words that you choose to use.

How can you develop this mindfulness? By taking a vow of silence. Your homework for at least one week is to be silent for at least 6-8 hours a day. During this time, you will say nothing. Instead, you will be in a state of reflection. I want you to become extremely observant this week. Observe your thoughts. Observe the words that you use when you speak. Observe everyone around you. Observe the ways that they speak about themselves and others.

This will be a very powerful homework exercise, so please be sure that you complete that assignment. After you are done with your vow of silence week, journey all about your experience.

  • What did you learn about your inner thoughts? Are your thoughts empowering or disempowering?
  • What did you learn about the words you choose to use when you speak about yourself? Were the words that you used uplifting or were they hurtful? Do they empower you or disempower you?
  • What did you learn about the words you choose to use when you speak to others, either about yourself or them? Were the words you chose to use empowering or disempowering?
  • What did you learn about the way that people speak around you? How do they speak about themselves? How do they speak about others?

Now that you see what your baseline is, I want you to start shifting perspectives. How do we begin to shift the inner narrative? I want you to start speaking to yourself as if you are speaking to your inner child at ALL times. When you speak to yourself, imagine that you are only 5 years old and that you are always speaking to your 5 year old self. Would you speak to a kid as harshly as you speak to yourself?

Use this tool to change the narrative and shift the ways that you speak to yourself. In time, that critical voice will fade into a loving one.

Well Soul Fam, I hope that this information has helped you with connecting some dots. Until next time… Sending mucho luz + amor always!

Luna Estrellas

1 comment

  • Doing this exercise was not as easy as I assumed it would be. SILENCE is powerful. It opened up my vision and hearing. There was alot I was not allowing myself to see or hear.
    Speaking to myself as a 5 year old has allowed me to slow down. I am as you have said in your video a person who wants control out of fear. This is challenging to release but I am on the path. Work in progress.. thanks for sharing to teach for those willing to learn grow and change for a better self.


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