Codependency: a deep inner child wound
Hey Soul Fam!
I want to take a moment to touch upon codependency and breaking down what that means from a psychological level because this has been such a huge theme in the last year. Codependency is not to be confused with BEING codependent. Being codependent is something completely different and the definition of codependent is what most people think of when they hear the term codependency used, yet these terms should not be used or thought of in conjunction of one another. According to the dictionary codependent can be used in two ways and means: (adjective) characterized by excessive emotional or psychological reliance on a partner, typically one who requires support on account of an illness or addiction or (noun) a person with an excessive emotional or psychological reliance on a partner, typically one who requires support on account of an illness or addiction. When people hear the term codependency, they usually thinks it is synonymous with the term codependent but we’re here to learn how it’s not.
Codependency on the other hand is composed of a large number of traits, thought patterns, and behavior patterns that develop in childhood as a way to cope with trauma. Many of us grew up in families where addiction, mental illness, or other dysfunctional problems were internalized. Yet it is more common that your codependent traits and patterns were passed down onto you by your parents- and furthermore I find this inner child wound to be more related to the mother than the father, but it isn’t exclusive to mother wounding. Codependency isn’t something that effects just romantic relationships either, even friendships can form under this structure. People who are stuck in these cycles also tend to be captain save a hoe people pleasers, yet they often also try to control other people and situations. Some of us tend to get obsessed with others and their problems, to the point where we neglect our own selves. We also tend to base our happiness on what others are doing or seek validation from others all together. Since we live in a world where this isn’t really spoken of, it can be difficult to come to terms with the fact that you have codependency tendencies. Check out the following checklist and see how many resonate with you. Knowing where your issues lie is half the battle.
Here are some of the most common characteristics of codependency:
- You focus on other people’s problems and needs in the form of caretaking, controlling, advice giving, and worrying about others. This is playing captain save a hoe.
- You can be controlling and perfectionistic. You want things to be done a certain way and may resort to telling others what to do and how to do it. This aspect here is definitely passed on from controlling parents.
- You can be critical of others and other people often don’t live up to your expectations. Which gets passed down from your parents criticizing you.
- You struggle with asking for or accepting help. You think everything falls on you and that you are responsible for the entire world- when you’re not.
- You struggle and even get highly upset when things don’t go as you have planned or envisioned. You crave predictability, structure, and certainty- all the things you probably didn’t have in your childhood family.
- You’re self-critical. You also set unrealistic expectations for yourself and are harsh and critical of your imperfections and mistakes. Your self-criticism is a result of your low self-esteem and the harsh criticism you’ve gotten from others. You continue to speak to yourself in the same ways adults spoke to you as a child.
- You feel responsible for everything and everyone, even other people’s happiness. Which definitely came from enmeshed dysfunctional family who constantly vented and emotionally dumped on you during childhood and adolescence.
- You’re afraid to upset or disappoint others so you people please. This came from validation you received as a child for saying or doing the “right thing”, but this can lead to over-extending yourself and feeling burnt out and resentful.
- You have trouble with boundaries, speaking up for yourself, and saying “no”. At times, you let people mistreat or take advantage of your kindness because you don’t want to hurt their feelings, let them down, or create a conflict.
- You ignore your own feelings and needs. You completely invalidate yourself, your emotions, your wants and needs in the same ways adults did to you when you were a child. Since your focus in on others and you don’t feel worthy, you generally ignore or put your needs last.
- In addition to denying your feelings and needs, you may have a hard time seeing how unmanageable or unhappy your life has become. These are forms of denial.
- You base your happiness on what other people are feeling or doing. Your day is determined by the emotions of others- if they are good, you are good but if they are angry then your day is ruined. You have a hard time separating yourself from other people’s feelings, needs, and experiences.
- You define yourself in relation to others (I’m Jessica’s mom) and lack a strong sense of self- knowing who you are, what you believe, want, or like. You lack a strong sense of identity and tend to identify through others.
- You’re very hurt. For some, the pain is close to the surface and for others, it’s buried underneath anger and denial. The pain of being abused, lied to, cheated on, ignored, cursed at, rejected, or invalidated has never fully healed.
- You feel guilty and ashamed. Guilt and shame are the roots of low self-worth and low self-esteem. This is usually established through repeated verbal abuse from a parent who makes their child feel less than with the words they choose to describe them- such as fat shaming or slut shaming the child.
- You act like a martyr, taking care of everyone else, giving without receiving, and then feeling angry, resentful, and taken advantage of. Sometimes helping and taking care of others makes you feel good (needed and worthwhile) and other times it makes you feel angry and resentful. You may complain, yell, or passive-aggressively let people know you’re upset about “having to do everything”, but chances are you continue your pattern of martyrdom. This is a HUGE problem because you tend to overextend yourself to the detriment of yourself when you live within this pattern.
- You’re reactive. Anger and resentments build up over time causing you to seemingly overreact at times.
- You have a tendency to overwork and overschedule yourself as ways to prove your worth or distract yourself.
- Intimacy, open communication, and trust are difficult because you didn’t have role models for healthy relationships, and you’ve probably been hurt and betrayed in your relationships starting with your childhood and your parents.
- You’re afraid of anger, criticism, rejection, and failure. So, you “play it safe” and keep a low profile. Some may even indulge in emotionally unavailable relationships because they require less work.
- You may experience anxiety and/or depression.
How many of these characteristics did you check off? It’s important to know which characteristics you embody in order to break the pattern. Understand though that it is NOT your fault that you picked up these behavior or thought patters. Even the best of us who try our hardest to end up NOTHING like our parents, end up embodying some of their characteristics or thought patterns. Also understand that a lot of these things were developed within you as a way to cope with your environment when you were a child. Many of us were not taught or given any coping method tools that were actually healthy- so as a result we developed our own ways to cope. In order to change and shift this dynamic within yourself though, self-awareness must come to the forefront.
You will also have to learn acceptance, both of yourself and everyone else around you. You’re going to have to learn how to mind your fucking business and that you have NO control over anyone else, what they do or say, or how they choose to live their life. Even if you see them making mistakes and you’re thinking that you just want to help or save them- those are THEIR lessons to learn, not YOURS. Furthermore, there are plenty of people living karmic cycles and these tough lessons are meant to shape and mold them, and here you come trying to steal their lessons from them. Who the fuck do you think you are? You aren’t God. You don’t get to tell people how to live their lives or tell them what decisions they should make. You do not have the right to even do so. This is a VERY real ass conversation that we must all have with ourselves at some point. We must come to the realization that beneath it all, we’re really just trying to extend our control over someone else- we justify this by thinking that we just want what is best for the person, but who are we to decide what is best for others? No one, that’s who. You wouldn’t like someone else trying to tell you what to do or how to live your life- yet here you are trying to extend your control onto someone else’s life. Realizing the depth and reality of what you’re doing needs to happen so that you can stop. The ONLY person you have control over within this universe is YOU. In reality you want to help people out of selfish reasons because YOU can’t bear to see someone going through pain, hurt, or whatever- but that is a YOU problem. The person often living through the cycle doesn’t feel the same way and is even often oblivious of their problem to begin with. It is up to THEM to figure things out and not up to you to save or spare yourself emotionally by extending your control over them. That’s one of the realest things you will have to learn to rebalance yourself, so affirm that shit all day- I ONLY HAVE CONTROL OVER MYSELF AND ME ALONE. OTHER PEOPLES PROBLEMS ARE NONE OF MY BUSINESS. Affirm it and believe it to be true because it is.
Now in order to unravel this trauma we need to understand how the fuck it even got to this point, and we need to dissect our childhood and adolescence for these answers. Understanding the ways in which we were wounded and how we got to be to this place is extremely important to the healing journey. We can’t begin to heal from the things we refuse to acknowledge so lets go over some things that may have made you this way.
Codependency is a LEARNED response to trauma that you picked up as a child.
There is a very good chance you developed these traits early as a child as a way to deal with your abusive, chaotic, or dysfunctional family. There is also usually codependency within your family, especially within your mother, and you may notice that she carries these traits too. During your childhood and adolescence, you may have dealt with emotionally overwhelming situations. As a result of this trauma, you learned that keeping the peace, taking care of others, denying your feelings, and trying to control things were ways to survive and cope. Many of you felt completely out of control within your own home- your life and every decision was in the hands of the adults around you. For some people, this trauma was subtle, almost unnoticeable and some may not even identify with abuse because it wasn’t as traumatic as others have experienced. For some people, this trauma isn’t physical in any way, but mental, emotional, or psychological- based more on emotional or verbal abuses. Even those who feel as if their childhood was fairly normal, may have experienced or observed generational trauma firsthand, and your parents or close relatives passed some of their trauma responses down to you.
You probably believe something is wrong with you and that you aren’t worthy.
In psychology shame can be defined as “the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.” The children who experience family trauma tend to believe that there is something fundamentally wrong with them. For some people, their parents may have bullied them, and verbally abused them in various ways. For others, their parents may have blamed them for their life problems, relationship problems, addictions, or even unemployment. These feelings got reinforced within us the more we felt mistreated, rejected, or abandoned- we wondered what is wrong with us and why our parents didn’t love us. This one gets really deep because so many people stay in toxic cycles with family and even within their relationships due to this aspect. Feeling lack mentality, like you aren’t good enough, like you aren’t worthy, like you don’t deserve good things, like you are always left out in the cold, like you have been abandoned or neglected, like you will never amount to anything, or even having imposter syndrome- all stems from these feelings of shame. Feeling not worthy or good enough will keep you in cycles where you constantly seek that validation or attention from others, and this can be unhealthy as fuck, because no one in this world can actually validate you. Seeking validation even from our parents is something that must be released and let go of with an understanding that no one can actually validate us. For many of us, the reality is that we’re seeking validation from people who are broken, ignorant, and unhealed themselves- people who have absolutely no idea what unconditional love looks or feels like because they do not possess it for themselves. How can someone like that give YOU validation? They can’t. They haven’t even dealt with their own trauma yet and can’t validate their own selves, let alone validate you. Learn to accept people as they are and seek validation from no one but yourself. Go inward when it comes to validation and please try to understand that external validation doesn’t matter. It’s all about how YOU feel about YOU, so don’t let anyone else’s opinions determine how you feel.
Codependency is an unhealthy focus on other people’s problems, feelings, and needs.
This one here is learned because your parent emotionally dumped on you as a child. Some families are dysfunctional but enmeshed and for some of us, that means that we became responsible in ways for our parents and their emotional well-being. Did we ask for that responsibility? No, but our parents put all their shit on us, forcing us to grow up quick, and have to deal with adult problems and situations well before it was our time to. This ends up getting carried over into our adulthood though and then we think we can tell people what is best for them- but that’s only because we’ve been playing therapist and giving advice to people since we were kids. We also may feel that focusing on other people and their problems is a way to feel needed, and to avoid or distract ourselves from our own problems. This is especially true of those of us who have an avoidant attachment style. We may also become so focused on others that we lose ourselves in the process, and that is common. Some may even feel addicted to another person and relationships may develop an obsessive quality that’s hard to quit even when you know it’s unhealthy. Some people get so wrapped up within their relationships that their self-worth and identity become based on the relationship rather than who they actually are.
People who live within codependency dynamics are very sensitive to criticism.
People who fall within codependency tend to be sensitive to criticism, yet they often also tend to be highly critical of themselves. Some may become desensitized to others’ criticism due to being repeatedly hurt, blamed, or criticized as children. Some may use humor as a way of coping with their pain or hurt when someone speaks to them critically. Others may bend over backwards to divert attention from themselves by trying to keep other people happy. For some people that means making themselves as small as possible, and they tend to stay quiet to keep any attention from being drawn to themselves. Doing all this though comes from a time in your life were you dealt with your parents or family being critical of you. They may have called you names, spoken about your body, your characteristics, and may have even bullied you about things. The way you chose to cope with their criticisms though is where the problems lie. Some people don’t acknowledge any issues at all and make everything into a joke, they even joke about themselves as a way of minimizing their pain. Some people become hardcore people pleasers as a way of turning attention away from themselves. Some people shrink themselves small and get quiet as a way to avoid any conflicts. Either way, we all avoid at all costs, our actual emotions and the emotions of others are never validated and that is where the real issue lies. To be repeatedly criticized was a fuck you to our inner children, and the adults in our lives acted as if our feelings didn’t matter- our feelings were never validated and so as adults we have issues validating our emotions or even believing them to be important. Many of us still speak to ourselves in these critical ways and invalidate ourself, emotions, and experiences in the same ways that the adults in our lives did. STOP doing that. Stop invalidating your emotions because they matter.
People who fall within codependency are usually super responsible.
For many people who embody codependency traits, they may have been made to feel responsible for others. Due to this, many can even feel like their families would fall apart if they weren’t around, they feel like the glue that holds it all together. For some, there was role reversal within your family and your parent could have taken on the role of a child, leaving the child (usually the eldest) to take on the role of a parents. This child will then essentially run their household and make sure that everything runs smoothly- even with their siblings. These children are often handed extra responsibilities that they did not ask for, but they step up to the plate regardless. They are the ones who makes sure that bills get paid, their siblings are fed, and may even shield their siblings from the fights of their parents. Most of us were very responsible children who, out of necessity, became responsible for taking care of parents, siblings, household chores, and schoolwork without parental assistance. Due to this though we find it easier to care for others than ourselves. We gain self-esteem from being responsible, dependable, and hard-working, which can be a slippery slope to go down when it comes to validation. As adults this doesn’t stop but it grows and evolves in all relationships we have. This is also how savior mentality is built and furthermore, why some people feel responsible for others. In all actuality though, aside from your children, you are never responsible for anyone else in this world. People who carry this trait though tend to overextend themselves, have issues saying no or setting boundaries, and because they are always just trying to be helpful, the do this often to the detriment of themselves. This can be dangerous in the work sphere because people will take advantage of this nature and before you know it, you’re a workaholic who doesn’t know when to take a break. Most overextend themselves and play the martyr or sacrifice themselves only to feel burnt out and then grow resentful that they’ve given more than they had to give- in any capacity.
Talking about feeling responsible, when people carry codependency traits they also tend to be givers, even to the detriment of themselves.
This point needs to be reiterated because playing captain save a hoe, caretaking, enabling, playing the martyr, sacrificing yourself, and giving until you have nothing left to give are all signs of codependency. While being helpful, kind, or giving isn’t necessary a bad thing, people who fall within codependency tend to give to their own demise. It tends to get unhealthy because they will put their time, energy, and money into helping or doing for others even when it causes them distress or hardships. They would spend their last money on someone else, even if it meant not being able to pay their own bills. This overly caring nature tends to also makes us susceptible to being mistreated or taken advantage of. Since setting boundaries and saying no is such a struggle for us, people tend to take advantage and even take that kindness for weakness. This leads us to become resentful of people or even becoming burnt out. Learning how to set boundaries and how to say no is extremely important for us to learn. Learning how to take a break to refill our own cups is also as important. It is important to practice self-care and self-love and create a routine for ourselves where we do so on a weekly basis. You can still help other people, but NOT to the detriment of yourself. Learning balance and when to rest is necessary on this journey because there is a time for work and then there is a time for rest. You will have to learn how to set boundaries with others and how to give to yourself what you so freely give to others. If you feel yourself constantly depleted by other people, then you definitely need to learn how to say no and establish boundaries with others. Even more so you will need to learn how to practice self-care and how to give from your surplus and NOT from what you just merely have. You can’t give to others when your cup is already empty, and even when your cup is full, you should only be giving from the extra. Concentrate and focus on yourself instead and fight your urges to help others, especially when you aren’t even in a position to comfortably help.
Codependents block and avoid their own feelings.
People who tend to fall within codependency usually have unsecure attachment styles that foster it- namely the avoidant and fearful attachment types. Becoming avoidant of emotions, especially painful ones is a main coping strategy for us. Yet, blocking our emotions doesn’t help you process or release them, in fact continuing to block your emotions just further solidifies an emotional disconnect. Emotions are needed though to guide us in life. They help us navigate this world, and for those of you who know, emotions in this realm empowers us or disempowers us. When we feel hurt, disappointed, or angry, those feelings are a signal and effect of actions- either our actions or those of others. Acknowledging our emotions is needed to help navigate the way in which we not only deal with ourselves but other people. If someone has hurt you or made you angry, then this needs to be acknowledged and spoken about. You need to learn how to speak up and advocate for yourself because otherwise people will continue to treat you in the ways you are allowing. Feeling emotions, allowing yourself to acknowledge them, process them, actually FEEL them, giving your emotions a name, figuring out the ways it triggers you, are all very important parts of this process. Choosing not to allow yourself to feel anything is very unhealthy and goes back to you choosing not to validate yourself, your emotions, your experiences. Yes, in the beginning, emotions can feel SO intense but that’s only because you don’t have much experience yet with dealing with them. I promise that the more you practice this though- allowing yourself to feel, the easier this process becomes. Learning how to allow yourself to feel, and how to communicate your feelings in healthy ways is very important, especially when it comes to building healthy bonds and connections with others.
Codependents don’t ask for what they need or think they need help.
So, with many of us falling within unsecure attachment styles, learning how to verbalize our emotions or feelings is already an issue. When we don’t or can’t verbalize our feelings, we tend to suppress them and invalidate them. We also tend to not know what we want or how to actually communicate that to others. Even when we do know what we want, without practice with processing and communicating our emotions, it gets to be difficult to talk about. I used to always say that you can’t possibly know what you want until you know WHO you are- and I stand by that statement today. If you won’t acknowledge who you are, it can be rather difficult to know your wants and needs, what drives and motivates you, what brings you joy and happiness. It can also be difficult to meet our own needs to ask that others meet our needs when we don’t even know what they are to begin with. Having issues with self-esteem and self-worth brings us to this space where we don’t even feel worthy of having these conversations with others. Not asking that your wants and needs be met though, often leads to passive aggressiveness. The other side of this is that people who carry codependency traits also have an issue with accepting help. They often don’t feel as though they need it or want it- even when they do. Even when they do need help, they find it extremely difficult to actually ask for it. For some, this is a fear that stems from childhood when you may have been denied help when you asked for it.
People with codependency can be perfectionist.
Some who have codependency traits tend to get wrapped up in perfectionism. For some this is a way to cope with their chaotic and dysfunctional families. For some, they learned that the only thing the could control was their levels of achievement and some may even tie their validation to their achievements. For others they felt as though if everything was perfect, that everything would be ok. Underneath this issue though is the need for control and that is what is fundamentally happening here. People who carry this trait are often the type to never ask for anyone to help them with things, because they NEED to do it, so that it is perfect. Yet, the will then also complain that no one ever helps them. It can be difficult to live up to these expectations though and they tend to have high expectations of others. They may even become highly upset if things are not done exactly in the ways they wanted them to be done. It’s this need to control everything, how things happen, how things unfold, how things gets set up, how things get built- its this need to control every minute detail that drives them. We try to overextend our control in every way but its only because as children we felt as though we weren’t in control of anything. Learning how to speak about our feelings, learning that it’s OK to ask for help, and actually accept that it won’t be “perfect” by our standards every time is something that perfectionist need to learn. These traits in a lot of ways overlap each other, and certain aspects of ourselves must be acknowledged in order for healing to occur.
Anyone has the ability to reprogram themselves and it is very possible to change your codependency patterns. I will not lie and tell you that it is easy, but I do know that it is possible. This type of change will be a long and gradual process that requires a deep sense of self and self-awareness. You have to be OK with being made to feel uncomfortable as fuck. You have to be OK with your cognitive dissonance shattering, and your ego yelling at you that this is all so scary. Reprogramming the mind and reliving certain traumas will trigger your ego to try to save you from the emotional turmoil, so you will have to be strong to actually get the reprogramming done. For many people, this will not be a process that you can do by yourself. Most people need to see a therapist to help them with this process and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. While I know mental health is something that people do not really speak about or acknowledged within our community, it is so important to get help when you need it. Many of us will have to see a therapist or counselor to help navigate the inner child and the shadow working process.
How does healing begin though? First and foremost, if you are reading this then you have already begun the process. The first step to healing is acknowledging the problem- we can’t heal what we refuse to acknowledge, and you must take responsibility for yourself and your healing. I want you to go over the list of traits again, and this time I want you to actually write down the ones that resonate deeply with you. Those will be the traits that you begin unraveling first and they are the ones that should be acknowledged as they tie to your inner child trauma. Accept that you are going to begin the healing process. Accept that you may feel powerless on this journey at times, but that it is going to be OK. Accept that you have been wounded and that you have absolutely no idea who you are or how you feel. Go to google and download a few different “feelings wheel” because this wheel of feelings will be helping you identify your feelings as you continue with this journey. Being that most of us were not taught how to talk about or feelings, let alone allowed to FEEL our feelings, most of us are emotionally stunted and we need to learn how to actually name our feelings. Use these wheels to help you moving forward.
Next, get yourself a journal because you will be writing a LOT about your emotions, wounds, family, and your healing journey. You will also want to find affirmations that correlate with your wounds. Google is a great source for finding affirmations if you are having a hard time with writing your own. You can also google journal prompts for inner child healing and shadow working and write them down or print them out. Allow yourself to openly and honestly journal about your feelings, emotions, and experiences. Allow yourself to be emotional. Allow yourself to FEEL. Allow yourself to cry and purge what you are feeling. Reassure yourself that you are in a safe place and that no one has control over you anymore. Use your journal to release whatever it is that you are feeling. For some of you, you may release your emotions in other ways- through art, dance, music, or movement. The point is to find a healthy way to release whatever may come to the surface while you are on your healing journey.
Start to build boundaries with people who drain you, learn how to say no, and learn how to detach emotionally from the emotions and problems of others. Their problems are NOT your problems. Focus on yourself and YOUR problems. Mind your fucking business. If someone reacts to you saying no or setting boundaries in a negative way, then that is their problem, not yours. You are NOT responsible for the ways in which people CHOOSE to react. Yes, their reaction is and was a choice and if they choose to react negatively or immaturely, that is a reflection of THEM and NOT YOU. You’re going to have to learn how to be OK with that and keep it moving while asserting yourself and your boundaries. As an adult, NO ONE has control over you anymore and no one can make you feel shamed or guilted unless you allow them to do so. Detach and do not react to them. If you lose your friends or family, it’s OK, the universe will provide you with people who resonate within your levels. It’s ok to make new friends.
Find yourself by putting together a list of activities that bring you happiness or joy. What do you actually enjoy to do? What did you enjoy to do when you were a child? What did you enjoy to do when you were a teen? Think back about this and put together a list of activities. A huge part of reparenting your inner child is providing it with the things that you were denied as a child. Doing things that bring you happiness and foster joy will also help your self-esteem grow and as a result, also your self-worth. Doing things that bring you joy are also an act of self-care and self-love. Coming to this point where you resonate within the frequency of unconditional love will start with you. You need to love yourself and accept yourself wholly and fully.
Last but not least, get selfish as fuck- with your time, with your energy, with your money, with your efforts, with every fucking thing in you. Yet, I don’t want you to think of it as being selfish, even though that is what you will likely be called by those who demand things of you. You will be told you are just being selfish- but I can assure you that is far from the truth. What you are doing is an act of self-preservation, an act of self-love and self-care. You are choosing to take the same energy you give so freely to others and turn ALL of it back inwards onto you. You understand what and why you are doing this and so you stop letting people blame you for their shit. You are no one’s scapegoat. Everyone has their own path, and you are responsible for ONLY your path and your path alone. Doing this work will likely rub people the wrong way, but that’s just because they won’t be able to use or abuse you anymore. Stand your ground, don’t back down, and continue to advocate for yourself. Hold your boundaries strong and be OK with doing less to keep your peace and sanity. Ultimately when you do this work, you will begin to reach a level of unbotherness that will piss other people off, but that’s their problem not yours.
On this journey you will be triggered and tested within your external environment. The universe will give you opportunities to test the skills you are gaining and working on. They will test your ability to speak up and advocate for yourself. You will be tested when it comes to processing and verbalizing your emotions in healthy ways. The way to emotionally react to things will be tested. Those of you who play martyr will have to acknowledge that and then you will be tested until you release that trait. Those of you learning to set boundaries will be tested, as will your ability to hold them down strongly while saying NO. You will be tested when it comes to your ability to just mind your damn business and not become involved in problems that are not yours. You will be tested when it comes to your savior mentality. You will be tested when it comes to being able to not only ask for help but allowing yourself to receive it. Your perfectionism will be tested. Your feelings of worth, value, your self-esteem, your lack mentality, your abandonment and neglect issues will all be challenged. Your trust issues will be transmuted when you realize that you really only have to learn to trust yourself. Your fears will be dragged to the surface to be released as well. This journey will not be an easy one, but the healing is well worth it. It will take a lot of honesty and self-awareness to get through this process but if you are willing to make the changes necessary, then change is possible!
Well Soul Fam, I hope that this information has helped you with connecting some dots. Until next time… Sending mucho luz + amor always!
XoXo,
Luna Estrellas